Self-Worth Is the Root of Every Relationship

We often focus on the other person when a relationship isn’t working.

“Why won’t they commit?”

“Why do I keep attracting the same kind of partner?”

“Why do I always end up feeling unseen, unappreciated, or not enough?”

But what if the real starting point isn’t them, it’s you? Not in a shame-blaming way, in a powerful, healing way. Because the relationship you have with yourself is the root of every other relationship in your life.

Self-worth isn’t about thinking you’re perfect. It’s not about pretending you don’t want love or connection. Self-worth is a deep, internal knowing that you are valuable, lovable, and enough, even when life is messy, even when others don’t see you clearly, and especially when old wounds try to convince you otherwise.

When you don’t feel rooted in your worth, you might:

• Overgive to prove you’re lovable

• Stay in relationships that drain you

• Accept breadcrumbs because you fear being alone

• Silence your needs to keep the peace

• Confuse control or intensity with love

How do you being rooting into your worth? You remember who you are. You come home to yourself: slowly, gently, fully. You rewrite the stories you inherited, the beliefs you absorbed, and the patterns you’ve been repeating since you were a teenager.

Here’s a simple exercise from the workbook to get you started:

Ask yourself:

• How do I define my self-worth today?

• What messages did I receive growing up about being lovable or “good enough”?

• Where in my relationships have I ignored my own needs in order to be chosen?

In the begining of my healing journey I had a hard time with that first question. I didn't know how to answer it. Because of that I wrote out a few examples for you to get started.

• “I define my self-worth by how I treat myself with love and kindness, even on difficult days.”

• “My self-worth comes from knowing I am worthy of love and respect, regardless of what others think or say.”

• “I define my worth by how I honor my needs, set boundaries, and prioritize my well-being

When you begin treating yourself like someone who is worthy of love, with the way you talk to yourself, the boundaries you set, and the care you give yourself, the outer world starts to shift too.

If you're interested in learning more about the concepts of self-worth consider coming to a Worthy of Love workshop!